Introspection is not a dirty word!
“A man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest” A line from a Simon & Garfunkel song has been circling in the “windmills of my mind” for a few days now. Along with this I have reflected on different people who on occasion have asked me, what do you think of this? Or how do I look in this dress? To illustrate the point, a friend of mine was travelling in the personal jet of a well known music celebrity and was asked by him, who had written a children’s book, what do you think of this? My friend who has written some 15 books to date, said Craig, what do I say to a man inside his plane at 35,000 feet when the book is crap? It leads me to wonder whether we want to hear, what we want to hear, or whether we really want to know what another thinks? And whether we will disregard the rest if it isn’t palatable.
I know one or two people who will always ask questions and never really want to hear the answer, for while I am answering their question, you can see they are hastily preparing other questions. I have slowly started to learn that giving them an answer with a question causes them to stop and think. I would like to believe that is one of the best things that happens to me in my life, when I am coasting along and thinking on one track, out of left field comes a point where I am caused to reflect more deeply about where I am, and the possible results of my actions. I was censured the other day for being slow to say something in a situation, and whilst the criticism was valid, I have noted with some curiosity that I have become much more introspective of late, and I have become aware that others may misinterpret my silence as disdain or indifference. What to do?
I have been blessed or cursed with an ability to see beyond the present, I have a real sense that I am often surrounded by my ancestors who must look down from their ascendant vantage upon me with mixed feelings of pride and disdain for the actions which I do that all too often remind me of my many imperfections. It’s not that I am beating myself up; it’s just that I aspire to a measure of greatness that transcends any plane to be better than anyone else or in a cheap manner be compared to anyone else. I want to be better today than I was yesterday. That said I am beset so often by my foibles. My introspection has become a dear friend that helps me make sense of the world, of situations and of the consequences of my actions. Does that mean I am getting older and wiser? Older perhaps, but wiser would be a question better answered by you! I love having the opportunity to express myself through this blog. Even if no one reads it.
Comments
the process of allowing others to see into me a little is a process I am beginning to embrace.
I really appreciate you visiting here.
I have to ask...are you really allowing people to see into you?
Honestly?
Or are you allowing people to see the edited and socially acceptable side that we all prefer people to see?
I do enjoy reading your thoughts, but I put to you that they are probably spring-cleaned before you put them out there.
Am I right or wrong?
Do you think very carefully about how your words, sentences and thought will be received and then clean them up before posting them?
This is where blogging can be untruthful. People aren't really seeing into us. We are in fact distorting the lens to show only what we want to show for fear of people seeing the real us.
I did enjoy this post Craig.
I admire what you are trying to do.
You have a wonderful heart.
I would really like to see you explore your relationship with your son in writing. It may be possible that he is the greatest lesson for you.
Your journey with him and the pearls of learning along the way would make far more interesting reading than celebrities and famous folk.
you say many things that are interesting. I certainly would not have thought I spring clean my thoughts and feelings before putting them here, well no more than I would before I would speak normally either. I certainly do not think my posts would be in anyway a sanitised view of what I want people to see. Finally, I agree about your comments regarding my son, I do learn much from his simplicity. More will come in time.
Thanks
“I certainly would not have thought I spring clean my thoughts and feelings before putting them here, well no more than I would before I would speak normally either.”
This is a rather telling response Craig.
It could be read to mean that you are a guarded person in your daily verbal interactions and this overflows into your writing.
Whilst you assert that you ‘think’ your posts are not ‘sanitised’ they, in fact, do come across that way to your reader (this one in particular). You are obviously unaware of it.
I also must clarify; I am not saying that this is necessarily a bad thing. I am saying that we all do it, whether we are aware of it or not.
It is not a criticism Craig. It is an honest observation. Take it for what it’s worth.
(Please note: I come in peace)
Flag down, no need for peace and war, certainly too much of that already in the world. I appreciate your observations, and whilst you have the freedom to express what you think to be the case, you must also know that it IS your opinion. I could certainly shoot my mouth off and say whatever on this blog and in my day to day social intercourse, but I am a person that would regret saying anything that might hurt or injure or offend. Though I do upset and offend on occassion is a matter of course and is almost guaranteed, being that we are all meeting life with different experiences and philosophies, I just say that I like to be mindful of others sensitivities, and when I say that I never meant to hurt, injure or offend, whether it is accepted or not, I know within I am at peace with that. I still maintain that what you read IS how I feel, and if sanitised would ONLY be for the way it is presented, not the content.
Cheers
“Flag down, no need for peace and war”
Indeed.
My comment “I come in peace” was a humorous signal that I meant no malice.
Quoting Craig:
“I could certainly shoot my mouth off and say whatever on this blog and in my day to day social intercourse, but I am a person that would regret saying anything that might hurt or injure or offend.”
Then you are a man among men Craig!
Sensitivity is a very difficult trait to find these days.
It is reassuring to know that your posts will be thoughtfully constructed with other peoples’ feelings in mind.
We do live in a world where it is commonplace for people to ‘flame’ others with no thought of the fallout or impact.
Peace, love and mungo beans!
(Violin to Tuba)
Nothing special about me, I have been blessed and cursed with a love and respect for my fellow beings, I hate being hurt and belittled and I certainly will not engage in any behaviour whether written or spoken that will encourage that for others.
All are welcome here.
"I have been blessed and cursed with a love and respect for my fellow beings"
In what ways has this been a curse to you Craig?
V2T
A chain of thoughts ran through my mind when I read the (original paragraph) Craig.
A well noted thought and comment. It is acknowledged and reference to the celebrites name has been removed. Thanks.
This is not a personal journal written in the privacy of your own home. It is an internet blog, accessible to anyone.
If your love of writing takes you to the realms of actual publishing Craig, these observations are things to keep in mind.
they have been note for future posts
V2T
September 26, 2007 9:58 AM
I will make comment regarding why it's a curse in my next post.
Apologies for editing your post. I did so because the points you raised were valid.
You made a comment on Orchestral Manouevers post
"Craig, it doesn't matter who or what I am.
I am a faceless, nameless person out here in cyberspace, like so many others who could be frequenting your pages daily."
agreed. Though knowing and understanding who or what you are matters to me.
cheers & regards
“.... knowing and understanding who or what you are matters to me."
Craig, I understand your request.
Suffice it to say I am sure that time will eventually come.
I truly believe that I am more useful to you under an anonymous signoff.
I would like you to be comforted in knowing that I am here to help if I can. I hope that was evident with my suggestions in my recently erased post. I would not like to see you suffer retribution for an inadvertent error.
You have great potential and your blog is wonderful to read. I can give input that assists your writing metamorphosis from the chrysalis if you are willing.
The input will be best given from an anonymous place for now. Particularly if the input is a critique. It is without the emotional fetters of personal attachment and relationship...easier to bear.
To illustrate, I refer you back to the opening paragraph of your "Chrysalis" entry. Your author friend had a terrible quandary...to be honest with the famous celebrity and risk hurting him and their relationship, or to say "there, there, very good" and humour him with dishonesty.
Can you see my position and the parallel with what we are discussing?
Thank you for being open to my suggestions. I am glad for your sake that you edited.
God Bless
V2T
"I have been blessed or cursed with an ability to see beyond the present"
If you feel so inclined, when you have a moment, I am interested in how this ability presents itself as a curse to you.
Cheers
V2T
“The questions and responses will not be sanitised or treated, they are here as they were written. The comments that would be deleted are ones that use overt rudeness or explicit language.”
Quoting V2T 25 Sept 07:
“Rest assured Craig, I have no desire to be overtly rude, profane or to use explicit language. These behaviours are all unnecessary in honest academic and intellectual discussion.”
Quoting Craig 26 Sept 07:
“Apologies for editing your post. I did so because the points you raised were valid.”
FOR THE RECORD (for any other readers):
I posted a section on 26 September 2007 giving counsel regarding ethics in writing for the public forum. The post advised caution with the use of celebrity names and outlined possible outcomes.
Unfortunately, the majority of the post has been deleted, in spite of the fact that the post did not contravene the rules as outlined above by Craig.
I must state that the sections deleted WERE NOT profaning, vulgar, or offensive, neither did they contain explicit language.
Craig agreed that my points were valid and acted on them by editing his blog. However, I am unsure why so much of my original post was deleted.
It would have been sufficient to simply insert [famous celebrity] in place of the name we were discussing (originally introduced by Craig), thereby ethically censoring without destroying the message of the entire post.
Craig, it is possible that other aspiring writers and bloggers who visit your site could have learned from the recommendations and integrated them into their work. In your zeal, you have denied them that opportunity.
V2T
"Craig, it is possible that other aspiring writers and bloggers who visit your site could have learned from the recommendations and integrated them into their work. In your zeal, you have denied them that opportunity."
Perhaps, though I am confident that if people do feel that they would like further information from the post you added afterwards, they will contact me!
You have great potential and your blog is wonderful to read.
Thank you. I appreciate your input.
“Perhaps, though I am confident that if people do feel that they would like further information from the post you added afterwards, they will contact me!”
Hmmm…. Perhaps,... now that you have issued the invitation
V2T